Saturday, 2 October 2010

What you wish you did

Today I came across the news of the death of a vibrant young man who passed away in a tragic accident a few weeks ago. For some reason, the knowledge of his death overwhelmed me with so much grief that for the first time in my life, I felt my heart mourn the death of a young man one year my junior whom I've never met in my life.

This is perhaps a reminder to me that I should spend more time with my family and friends. Sometimes we find ourselves busy with so many different things. We tell ourselves that some things can wait. Some things are more important. We will always have time to go on that vacation with our family because this work is more important now. "When I finish this then I will have time to go on that vacation with them. If I don't finish this now, I'll never be at peace even when I'm on that vacation."

One day, everything will end. Decide now on what is really important. If you have thanks to say to a person who has helped you in your life, say it now. Don't be shy. If they leave before you expect them to, you will wish you had said what you wanted to say now to them. If you tell them now, you will smile together with them. Everybody appreciates gratitude. It tells them that they're doing something right and sometimes, it can motivate them to do even better. That's what you want.

One day, your routine will change. You might not be able to cross paths with the person you see everyday now anymore. Think about this. How many of your childhood or high school friends do you still see everyday? If he/she has impacted your life, do something to show them how much you appreciate them in your life. Once your paths no longer cross, you will be thankful that you shared your love the way you did.

If you have someone in your life you cannot forgive - perhaps he/she has wronged you so badly that you never want to talk to him/her again - try your best to let go of the grudge. It's okay. Some things are more important than being right. Surely he/she has good points. Don't let hate ruin a friendship. Forgive them and move on to love. You will find it more fulfilling. When the time comes and final goodbyes are exchanged, you will know that forgiving him/her was the best choice that you could have ever made.

If somebody has requested for you to do something for them (maybe make a card for them or go on a trip with them), try your best to fulfill their wishes even if you are busy. This will be one of the things that people remember most about you - that you were there when they wanted you to be.

Don't be too caught up with errands and routine. Don't mind changing your routine to accommodate a request.

Hold your tongue before you speak. People will appreciate your thoughtfulness. Careless words can hurt a person for life.

Appreciate little things that people do for you. Say thanks.

Sometimes people need someone to listen to them. So be that person to put down your work and just listen attentively to what they need to say. You will be thankful one day when their voices become silent and part of your memories alone.

When people give you advice, try and listen without rebutting first. People who give us advice at least care enough to spend time analyzing us. One day we will miss their criticism when we have no one who cares enough to try and correct our mistakes for us.

Life is not only a gift not to us but also, to others. We give our life to others so that others can find convenience in their own. We share what we have too much of with others who who do not have enough. Sometimes, there are people who do even more than this - they give others what they need even when they themselves do not have enough.

Finally, I wish to say sorry to all who I have hurt. I know that I am a careless speaker and sometimes, I spend too much time worrying over the small details of an activity instead of focusing on your feelings. I am thankful that more often than not, my family and friends have forgiven me for all the hurt that I have caused them in my thoughtlessness.

We are but temporary visitors to this place. Our visas will one day expire and we will have to depart. We live in hotels with check out times and dates. For most of us, we don't really know when our visas expire or when we need to check out. So we need to make sure that every moment is lived well because the next moment could be when we need to leave this place for somewhere else.

I pray for the families who have lost a young child. I know how much hope is put in an adolescent in his prime. To lose such hope is to akin to losing hope in life itself. The place your child has in your heart can never be taken by anything or anyone else. Your grief is too enormous to be felt by people who have never been parents. I have no words of comfort tonight for you but rest well, eat well and be well. That is what your child has always wanted of you too; the same as what you've always wanted of him/her - for him/her to be happy, healthy and well.

Remember how I said I loved the pink twilight sky? One day after a meeting on campus, I met with this beautiful sky and decided to take a picture of it so I could share it with you ^^

Usually when I see this, it's already past 6pm and I am reminded of how much time I've spent on campus. But seeing it also gives me hope because at least I am out of a classroom or meeting in time to see this beautiful sky before it leaves. The calm breeze which usually accompanies this beautiful sky reminds me too that I am lucky to be alive and this brings gratitude to my heart for everything and everyone I have in my life. I hope that like me, you too will find happiness, joy and comfort in looking at this beautiful pink sky.

Perhaps coincidence will one day allow us to be standing in different positions on campus looking at the same sky thinking the same things about life. And if that happens, I am comforted that at least one other person is happy like me :)