Love

Today I realized that you, my dear fellow human, do not need my criticism to be better. In fact, criticism can hurt you a lot, because I think we might have much more pride than we'd like to admit.

I realize that words really can be sharper than a knife. It really can kill. And I know that it has.

Perhaps if we were more tactful in our everyday dealings, we would smile more and perhaps too, by not being so careless with our thoughts, there would also be a smile on our faces when it all ends.

What you need is my love, my support, my concern and my kind words.

And for me to stand behind you and say, "It's okay if you trip because I'll be right behind you to catch you when you fall."

In fact, you need my appreciation. I don't live on hay. I live on food and more, I live on your love and care, everyday. We cannot live without food but we die without love.

No man is an island. Cherish, and cherish more. Everyday is a gift.

I love this song by Eason Chen:

好久不见

我来到你的城市
走过你来时的路
想像着没我的日子
你是怎样的孤独
拿着你给的照片
熟悉的那一条街
只是没了你的画面
我们回不到那天

你会不会忽然的出现
在街角的咖啡店
我会带着笑脸挥手寒喧
和你坐着聊聊天

我多么想和你见一面
看看你最近改变
不再去说从前只是寒喧
对你说一句只是说一句
好久不见

拿着你给的照片
熟悉的那一条街
只是没了你的画面
我们回不到那天

你会不会忽然的出现
在街角的咖啡店
我会带着笑脸挥手寒喧
和你坐着聊聊天

我多么想和你见一面
看看你最近改变
不再去说从前只是寒喧
对你说一句只是说一句
好久不见

How many people leave us without saying goodbye? If given another chance, what would we say to them?

Gung gung left 4 years ago in 2006. I was 17 and only starting my first year of college. One morning, at 4am, my dad got a call from Sibu. Grandpa passed away. The next day, I was back in Sibu.

At the funeral, I saw gung gung for the first time in months. I felt so much sorrow because I always lived so far from him that in front of me laid my grandfather who was also close to a stranger. I didn't know much about him. The only things I knew were that when I was younger, he brought us to eat yam ice cream. And until today, I cannot get that taste out of my head.

He used to love to use his old bicycle to cycle around Sibu town. I know he also liked to play mahjong. I always thought he had a simple and satisfying life in a peaceful small town. But one day, everything changed. He stopped seeing things clearly - he was losing his vision.

Then, he no longer rode around on his bicycle. His best friend was left to collect dust. He stopped playing mahjong and stayed at home everyday...

He became unhappy. "Ah Hing," he said to my dad on the phone one day, "ngui si mo yong ni neung (I am a useless man)."

Then dad handed the phone to me. "Talk to gung gung. Say something to him..."

"Papa, what should I say? I don't know what to say?"

I think I should have said I love you gung gung and went to Sibu to visit him.

Although on his death certificate, gung gung died of cardiac arrest in his sleep, I suspect he really died of unhappiness. Many people die of this illness - unhappiness. Some kill themselves.

On his funeral day, Uncle Alphonsus told ah ma not to cry. "Ah Pa will be home with God. God will take of him."

That night Uncle Alphonsus lead us to pray for my grandfather. That day too I realized how much I admired my Uncle Alphonsus. Almost the whole community around Sibu came with their heartfelt condolences for the passing of the father of their Father.

After gung gung passed away, I realized I should cherish people more. To say things to people now. To appreciate things that people do for me now. Tomorrow doesn't belong to us.